becoming who she is meant to be
"Salvation is all His idea, and all His work. All we do is trust Him enough to do it. It's God's gift from start to finish. We don't play the major role. If we did we'd probably go around bragging that we'd done the whole thing! No, we neither MAKE nor save ourselves."
To say that she has it all together would be a lie. To say that she doesn't hurt some sometimes or struggle sometimes, that she doesn't slip up sometimes, would be a lie. To say that she is perfect would be a lie, to say that she is 100% confident all the time, every waking day of her life, would be a lie. And to claim these things as inherent qualities would be a shame. It would be a sham,e because it would leave no room for God to actually work in her life. She has experienced God because she gave him her broken pieces; so she experiences wholeness. She has experienced grace because she knows how much she is undeserving; so she is forever grateful. She can appreciate the art of being whole, being free and being happy because she has to tasted brokenness, emptiness and sorrow.
She cannot be perfect and wont claim to be, but in Christ, she's glad she is able to be.
And she knows that it's not her.
Always. Only. Jesus.
Psalm 139: 13-16
"You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. YOU SAW ME before I was born..."
"He saw her. Even before she came into existence, He saw her. And that showed her that her value goes deeper than these pores, than these layers of skin, because He saw her. Way before she saw herself, way before she faced the mirror and learned to fear it. The fact of this matter, is that she is valued and important. And it was so, way before her skin tone affirmed, way before their lips confirmed, and before their eyes even got the chance to observe.
I AM already declared who she was.
Who she is.
Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?” “No, Lord,” she said. And Jesus said, “Neither do I..."
A King placed a crown upon her head and said that she had worth, intrinsic worth. The person of Jesus Christ puts worth upon woman like no one else, she had seen. She asks, "Why is it, that woman has always been seen as lesser than? Is it in our mentality? Are we born this way, with this type of thinking?" Objectified and belittled, used and abused? Then taken and thrown away. No respect. God’s creation, the crowning glory of creation, with man. Now the fault, the blemish. Never enough. Taught how to hate herself, rather than how to love herself. Shaped in iniquity. It’s no wonder her daughters belittle themselves in order to get the notice of man. It’s no wonder her daughters are broken. It’s no wonder her daughters are lost. It’s no wonder she acts hopeless. It’s no wonder she keeps breeding brokenness. It’s no wonder she hasn’t been made whole in so, so, long. It’s no wonder she needs to look through outlets to find her own worth, rather than looking within.
It’s no wonder the magazines don’t help. It’s no wonder the television doesn’t help. It’s no wonder her spouses can’t help. It’s no wonder her parents have no effect.
It’s no wonder she is still here, still cold, still helpless, still weak. Not because she was made that way, but because somewhere along the way, she lost sight of her innate worth and value, and searched for something better. Given an offer, that she could be better than she was.
When she was already perfect. She looked at it too much. Them: Social media, models, television, movies, music videos, the… fruit? Perhaps since then, her daughters have been setting their eyes on the wrong things. Seeing their value in things that won't even bring ultimate satisfaction. They keep looking... At him. At her At it.
It’s not there, because she was already made with the utmost worth and value. She is royalty.
She sets her sights on the One who actually sees her for who she truly is. He placed a crown upon her head.
Redeemed, renamed. No longer a sinner but saved. No longer trash, but treasure. Owned,
"God spoke: Let us make human beings in our image, make them reflecting our nature...God created human beings; he created them god-like, reflecting God's nature. He created them male and female...God looked over everything He had made, it was so good, so very good!"
From Genesis, You were Good, Eve. She was already perfect, she had already possessed the treasure. What was she looking for? Who lied to her and told her that she wasn't enough? What was she missing? She already possessed all the treasures- seen and especially unseen. She already had it all. She already was beautiful, already complete. What did she want to add that she didn't already attain? What was she missing? And what would have given it to her? She didn't know that it would have only taken away. Don’t be deceived.
And this scene has been playing over and over, over the centuries. She believed the lies the devil told her, making her reconsider what she already knew. It was in her mind, that the damage had been done. And it can only be undone by replacing the lies with truth. Don’t be deceived.
The devil is a liar. And over the years the lies have spread so much it seemed to be true, so believable, but.
Truth doesn’t change, truth is a constant. And doesn’t give in, even though a million lies surround it. So she makes truth her home, she makes truth her shield. Allowing it to be her fortress, safe haven. Those lies, when she believed them, only gave birth to destruction- sometimes to her own self.
She can finally see, that she kept replaying the same scene in the garden over and over again. But she remembered what He said when He looked at her;
He looked at her and saw that she was good.
"Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, because you are with me."
She's not saying that its easy. She's not saying that it will happen overnight. She's not assuming that she won't have to fight. Because she knows that the reality of this life is that, anything worth having needs to be fought for, worthless, purposeless things come too easy. Her sanity is worth fighting for, her self esteem is worth fighting for, her peace is worth fighting for, her purity is worth fighting for , her faith is worth fighting for.
So she will fight.
Take it or leave it.
The choice is hers to make.